Focus is an interesting word. I know I have written about it before, but it is important to attaining what we really, really want. The Webster’s Dictionary definition says it is a central point, or a point of concentration. It looks different to each of us based on a variety of factors. When we believe […]
I subscribe to email feeds from Trish Blackwell, a confidence coach, as I find this topic to be a good reminder for a sole proprietor. Today, she shared a link to a blog post on happiness, and how our thoughts contribute to confidence that I found particularly interesting. I’ll share the link at the end of this post. I highly recommend reading it.
I find the heart/mind/body connection fascinating. The work The HeartMath Institute (HMI, www.heartmath.org) does is of great interest to me. As we consider how to become the happy, true, authentic people we are capable of, and to expand our capacities, tapping into how our hearts and our heads work together can make a significant impact how we show up. My friend and mentor Kim Ades says you can be right or you can be happy, you need to choose. Stay with me as this gets unpacked.
Let’s start with the heart. According to HMI, the heart emits the largest electro-magnetic field of any organ in the human body. Additionally, this field can affect people a few feet away. If we choose happiness, that affects those around us. We attract the types of people we want to be around. The converse is true. If you are consistently unhappy, people sense that and you get treated accordingly. Most of us misinterpret how others relate to us as we believe they are judging us, and we don’t like that at all. I know, I dealt with this issue with my coach.
We’ve been conditioned for years (some of us more years than others) to believe that keeping our feelings bottled up is a good thing. Showing our hearts and emotions exposes our vulnerabilities, and that in and of itself can be very uncomfortable. Yet, I have found it to be something that contributes to my happiness. I remind myself frequently (i.e. every day) that I have a choice as to how I show up, and that it is my choice. As one who has identified my purpose, it absolutely helps to know your purpose and how that relates to your happiness. When that is the case, being vulnerable is less frightening, and is more authentic.
Oh, yea. Research indicates the heart has its own ability to essentially make decisions and reason outside of the brain. Trust your heart, it won’t steer you wrong.
Now let’s move to the head. I heard a Navy SEAL say that humans only use somewhere between 10-15% of their capacity. It’s our thoughts and beliefs that limit us from pushing that higher. I believe this includes our physical abilities, mental capabilities, and our abilities to be happy. As our thoughts ultimately translate to our actions and results, changing how we think and what we believe and know to be true about ourselves can’t help but push that number higher.
Likewise, there are doctors that have researched the mind/body connection specifically as it relates to the ability to overcome pain and physical discomfort. We have been created with the ability to heal ourselves to a significant extent. I don’t know that we could ever say that all ailments can be overcome by resetting the body to a ‘default’ condition, but it is a very interesting concept. What if our abilities to heal ourselves lies in that 85-90% of our capabilities that we’re not using? That’s a very interesting approach and idea. I don’t have the experience or education to say whether it’s true or not, but I totally see how that could be the case, and fascinating to ponder.
The vast majority of us can’t flip a switch and immediately change our happiness or our actions/results by changing our thoughts. Our belief system is far too ingrained in order for that to happen. Yet, it is possible to get to the source of our beliefs that keeps us from achieving our happiness, our greatness, and pushing the meter of how much of our capabilities we as individuals utilize higher. How high it can go is totally up to you.
The bottom line here is to connect both your heart and your head, get them to work in concert with each other. Choose to look at how you look at yourself first, and align you’re the two to move you to a happier place. I understand that we all go through seasons in our lives where unhappiness overwhelms us. As long as that isn’t chronic, that can actually be a good thing. Feelings like that are uncomfortable, especially for those of us who choose happiness and optimism. Yet, it’s in discomfort that growth occurs. Lean into the choice to look at the world from a better, more optimistic perspective. You’ll be amazed at the changes you will see.
The link to Trish Blackwell post
I played in a golf event a couple of days ago sponsored by our men’s group at church. My team consisted of four great guys: Matt, my nephew (a single digit handicap golfer), Peter (who was on my team last year), Bill (first time playing in this event), and myself. This was something I […]